


Jack Healed

by Asa_Meda



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 05:41:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4694156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asa_Meda/pseuds/Asa_Meda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>NOTE:  Again... past story that links a bit to "Rough Beginnings".  Wrote this after seeing 1st season of Torchwood.  Sigh... God it was good... until it wasn't.  And I needed to make the link between Doctor Who and Torchwood.  This begins right at the end of "The Last of the Time Lords".</p><p>I warn of mild torture (light description, really) but nothing too graphic.   Otherwise this can have graphic moments of sex   :-)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jack Healed

His cries were more than sound. Jack Harkness flinched as telepathic waves of pure, absolute emotion hit him. Still guarded... still wary for deception... he watched as the Doctor held the body of the Master. The world, plunged into near destruction and chaos over the past year, was now as if nothing happened. Oh... the President-elect was still dead but there was no invasion... no mass murder of sixty million Humans... no discovery of new aliens who were the bonding of the last Humans and the Doctor's own DNA. Caught on the eye of the storm, only those on the Valiant would know that history. The Earth... the Doctor's beloved Earth... was safe once more.

Tears stung Jack's eyes, making him jerk his eyes up and away to force them back. The grief was overwhelming. The Doctor was again alone... the last of his kind. But it was more than that. Over the past year Jack has learned so much more. The man... the Master... had meant more to the Doctor than that.

_... we were bound to each other..._

Bound... the Doctor had loved him. Jack eyes shifted to Martha who stood with her family, her expression confused and stunned... even a little angry. Her mother's expression held hints of hatred and little understanding. But they would not interfere, even if they could not feel. His eyes shifted to his left. Lucy. Human. The Master's killer. She stood listless, her eyes unseeing. Jack couldn't imagine what she had been subjected to during her time with the Master. His meager psychic skills sensed very little remained of her mind. He frankly was surprised she had shot him. His control over her had been absolute with no hint she had broken through.

But it was done. The Master.... Jack shifted uncomfortably... images of the past year... the words... the torture... Jack shook himself free and gestured to one of the guards still standing nearby. Silent but clear command. The guard nodded and gently took Lucy away. Later they would deal with her. Then the next step... Martha...

Martha's eyes met his. Brave Martha. Jack had sized her up in the first ten seconds he met her. Strong. Intelligent. Commanding. Loyal. When he sent her away he had high hopes she would do what he and the Doctor needed her to do. And she did more than was ever expected of her. Whatever her feelings now he knew he would always be able to depend on her... that she could be trusted with the Doctor and his missions to set right what went wrong.

"Take them," he mouthed to her as he indicated her family. _Take them out. Be with them._ He motioned another guard to help her herd them away.

Others also left, discreetly, until there were only two guards left. Support... just in case...

Slowly... carefully... Jack put his weapon down. The Doctor had stopped the near violent rocking of the corpse he held and simply sat as a silent statue, his face a mask of pure concentration Jack had seen once or twice before and feared the most. Healing. The Doctor wanted to heal, to bring back. Harkness knew nothing could be done but had no idea what the effort would do to his friend. With even pace Jack moved to the Doctor's side and knelt. Instinct told him to be cautious. The Doctor was powerful, more so than most truly understood. And he was unstable. With care Jack leaned forward to begin his hardest task. "Doctor."

He had not expected a reaction so he was not disappointed. With a little more force Jack spoke. "Doctor!"

Outwardly there was nothing. But Jack's inner self heard a tiny cry, a response of sorts. Taking a chance he put a hand on the Time Lord's shoulder. "Doc-"

The next moment Jack found himself flat on his back, sharp pain at the center of his chest. The Doctor's hand was still raised, his head turned towards him. His expression was terrible, streaked with tears Jack knew were rarely shed. Dark eyes blazed with an odd golden light. Jack's heart pounded into his throat as he understood. Time Lord unleashed. This he had seen only once... when the Doctor thought he had lost Rose, when his hands had gripped the dust on the floor that he thought had been Rose's body. Even then it had not been what it was now. Jack ignored the pain and waited as his broken ribs quickly healed. Baby steps... baby...

"Get away from me!"

Words. Jack recalculated as he met the Doctor's gaze without hesitation. Arms held the body of the Master like a mother tiger protecting her cub. "I'm not going to hurt him," Jack said as if the corpse still lived. "I'm not going to hurt you, Doctor." He licked his lips and said the words he needed to say. "It's over."

Jack wondered if the Doctor even heard him... wanted to hear him. It was all right. Jack was prepared to endure hours of this... days... if it would bring the Doctor back to them... to him. "Please let me take care of you."

He hadn't meant to say the words but he couldn't help it. It was truth and the Doctor needed truth. The Time Lord's soul was hemorrhaging and he needed help. Jack shifted, ready to sit up, ready to try again. Without warning his still bruised ribs protested and caused his breath to catch. Pain.

The Doctor's expression changed instantly. Power leashed itself. Hands around the Master loosened as dark eyes fixed on Jack. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

 _Oh fuck._ Jack forced himself to sit up, willed his body not to betray him again. "You have nothing to be sorry about." He carefully slid closer to the Time Lord again, ready for the next battle. "Please let my guards take him... away." He sensed the cry of protest before he saw the minute shake of the Doctor's head. "I promise he will be treated with respect." He again laid a hand on his friend's shoulder, ready for the reaction. "I promise no one but you, myself and those guards will be able to touch him."

He waited. The Doctor's tear stained face searched him. Jack held himself as open as he could as he sensed the light telepathic probe. Trust. He knew the Doctor trusted him, even if their initial reunion had had issues. And Jack trusted the Time Lord, with his immortal soul. So he waited.

And was rewarded. Slowly, with tender care, the Doctor brushed hair from the Master's forehead then shifted back as he took the body off his lap and laid him on the floor, arranging him in a comfortable position as if... the Master still lived. Then his head bent forward and Jack watched as tender lips brushed over the Master's temple. "Take him," he whispered intensely as he finished the ritual.

Jack motioned the guards forward. Their faces showed no emotion as they obeyed. One carried a long piece of linen over his arm. Jack sighed. Had to be done. "Doctor, come with me," he pleaded... commanded... as he stood and held out a hand. He had to get the Time Lord away. Did not want him to see...

The Doctor looked at Jack's hand then took note of the guards, of what one of them carried. Jack saw the other man's adams apple move in a deep swallow and wondered if more persuasion would be needed.

"Quite right," the Doctor said, his tone steady as if he were agreeing on a point of discussion. He sniffed and stood, ignoring Jack's hand but not moving away from him. He glanced again at the guards. "Do it... carefully."

The words were a command and a warning. Jack's mind shifted to Plan B and he stood in quiet support. Professionally, without a word, the guard with the linen laid it out on the floor then both of them gently lifted the Master's body then placed it in the center. Asleep. Jack caught that thought as he watched the Doctor watch the Master's face. Looked like sleep... when they would be... together. The muslin sheet was folded over the body then neatly tied. Then another guard appeared and the three men lifted the body and slowly carried him away.

Then they were alone. Jack waited. The Doctor stood frozen... lost... looking nowhere and everywhere. Jack waited. The Doctor sniffed and turned to face Harkness. Jack waited... and hoped... and-

Suddenly Jack found himself wrapped in the Doctor's arms, shivering and quaking. Recovering quickly Jack returned the embrace, holding his friend close, willing the Doctor to accept the simple human contact as means to dull the soul deep grief.

There were no more tears. And after some time and careful rocking Jack felt the Doctor's body calm, sensed the Time Lord's mind settle... a little. He did nothing more than stand and hold. The Doctor was not ready for more but Jack knew he would be there too... when the Time Lord was.

*************************************************************

It took little effort. Wood layered with flammable materials then fitted with a small air compressor to make the flames hotter, to be sure the task was done completely. Jack didn't ask. Didn't presume. He held himself as a shield for the days that passed, allowing only those he felt had the Doctor's best interests at heart to come near the Time Lord.

Martha was one of the first to come and was more than welcomed. She tried to comfort, in spite of her confusion and anger as she finally came to understand the Doctor's relationship with the man who had almost destroyed her family... who had destroyed the Earth. But after a walk, after a talk, it was the Doctor who comforted Martha, who held his hands to her temples, who held her as she let go and collapsed in his arms to cry out her torment and anguish.

And Jack watched. With some emotional difficulty on his part he had contacted his team. They were confused and anxious. Had been on their way to Napal, a secret project... or so they were told. Gwen swore it was Jack himself she had spoken to. Halfway on their journey they saw reports of Jack, a woman, and a man called "The Doctor" being sought as fugitives. One the plane there were agents who were telling them they were being detained, were going to be questioned. On the monitor they watched the President-elect die...

But then. abruptly, it was over. The aliens were gone. They were on their way back to Wales, no explanation... as if nothing happened. Jack told her to assure the team that he was fine, the situation was fine and he would be back within a few weeks, that there were unrelated issue he had to take care of that had nothing to do with Torchwood. Gwen accepted with the condition that they were told something. Jack promised they would all sit down and talk when he got back. So much was settled now... they deserved to understand more than they did.

He then asked about Ianto. He had to ask. In the year that wasn't, in a rare moment, the Master had visited him... alone. Had forced him to see... to witness... what he had done.

_Such loyal apes, eh freak? Especially that one. I made sure not a hair on his head was touched... saved him for last.._

Gwen's soft call brought Ianto on the cell. Jack could feel the tears running down his own face as the young welsh voice filled his ears.

"How are you, Jack?"

Battered. Traumatized. On duty. "I'm all right, Yan," he assured his friend... his would-be lover gently.

There was a long pause then. "I've had dreams... nightmares. Did... something happen?"

Jack had closed his eyes against the pain he sensed from Ianto; that echoed in his own soul. Sensitive. He already knew Ianto was among the two percent of Earth's population who would sense the time shift... the paradox. "Yan, listen carefully... it's gonna be okay. I promise it's okay. I'm going to have to take care of some things here then I'll come and we'll talk. Okay?"

On the third day the Doctor stood on the deck of the Valiant and stared at the Earth below. Jack watched as he sensed the torment beneath the quiet calm, the almost youthful exterior. After many hours Jack was rewarded with rough words that gave him direction. "I want his body burned," the Doctor demanded.

"I'll arrange it," Jack promised without hesitation and with some relief. The survivors on the Valiant were getting restless and were beginning to make their own plans. Jack Harkness warned those with the greatest influence that there would be hell to pay if anyone touched the Master's body before the Doctor was ready.

"I want him burned on a pyre," the Doctor said next, quietly. "On Earth."

Jack wanted to ask why. Was there some religious reason? Did Time Lords have religion? He wanted to understand but his inner voice counseled him. It wasn't his business. Nothing about the Doctor and the Master was his business. Jack could only accept... which he did... as he accepted everything that had to do with the Time Lord. "We'll talk about the details later but I'll make sure it's done."

Jack watched in the shadows as the Doctor stood before the pyre, a thick wooded torch held high. The moon was full but its light didn't seem to be able to penetrate here. There were no other witnesses. Even Jack himself was not invited... not really. But he came and the Doctor did not deny him. And he watched as the Doctor finally lit the kindling, as the Time Lord's dark eyes watched the flames quickly rise to envelope the body that had been laid on top. For several moments the scene was frozen. The pyre... the flames... the moon...

The Doctor's eyes met Jack at that moment and the former Time Agent felt a touch, gentle against the storm that was barely leashed. Jack watched as his friend finally threw the torch into the flames then took a step towards him, his eyes still intent, never looking back as he carefully approached. Jack watched as he wondered what he could do now... how he could help.

The Doctor stopped mere inches from him, his hands in his pockets, his expression as alien as Jack had ever seen it. The Time Lord's touch upon his mind was still light... just present. Almost seeking... almost waiting.

"Come to the TARDIS with me," the Doctor spoke, his tone casual. But within Jack felt a need... a wanting... a command.

Jack watched as the Time Lord turned and walked away, as casual as if he were strolling in a park. But there was the storm... gathering. There was that touch... gentle. There were those words... reaching. Jack watched the all-consuming flames for a single moment then followed his Doctor wherever the Time Lord would lead.

********************************************************

 

They transported to the Valiant, Jack careful to touch the Time Lord no more than necessary to get the job done. It wasn't that the Doctor didn't welcome contact but he wasn't inviting it. As they walked through the floating ship unchallenged Jack reflected on the fact that at one time he would have assumed the Doctor avoided touch out of Jack's... wrongness. But after a year, after... what happened... he no longer believed it.

 

_"Oh come on, Theta! Let's have some fun with the freak!"_

_Jack was tied to the steel railings of the upper deck, his arms stretched tightly above his head. For hours he had stood, ignoring the pain as he struggled to stay upright. Twice now he had suffocated when the weight of his body caused him to sag, caused his windpipe to constrict. It was slow, worse than a hanging. Each time he awoke on the cold hard floor only to be tied up again before he could fight._

_"He is not a freak!" The Doctor's voice was... old. It was a week since the invasion, a week since tens of millions of people had died and whole cities and nations had been destroyed. The Time Lord, his Time Lord, could no longer stand as his body became even more frail. A tiny tent had been erected, a blanket or two given, and the Doctor striped of most of his clothing. Even worse than a prisoner, forced to endure what the Master had done, forced to know what was going to be done. "He is human! Very human!"_

_The Master's head whipped back, briefly, to study Jack then refocused on the Doctor. "You're joking. This... thing?" He laughed delightedly and knelt down next to the Doctor, leaning close, kissing close... "Always breaking the rules, huh? Always. Even... in the end."_

_The Master's remark was a small whiplash, the latest of many. As a young Time Agent, Jack had an overwhelming interest in the mythology that was the Great Time War. Mysterious. Controversial. It was to the Time Agency what Roswell had been to 20th Century Earth, yet with far more detail that just barely missed being verified, an eternal shadow with no proof of its source._

_//...The Lotus Nations of Tarszcian V recorded the lore of the Lonely God forced to stand at the center of the oncoming storm while everything around him burned for the sake of all existence...//_

_Within his first hours aboard the TARDIS Jack understood that all the myths had been true. Time Lords... Gallifrey... Daleks... all too real._

_"There are no more rules." The Doctor's tired voice broke into Jack's reverie. "There is no more Law, except to take responsibility for what remains."_

_For a single moment the Master's manic expression stilled, softened, then hardened. "You have no right to preach morality to me!" he growled as he stood. "Not anymore!" His arm swung back._

 _Jack struggled as the Doctor was backhanded, as he saw the fragile man thrown against the make-shift tent, his head hitting the hard floor. "Bastard!" He pulled on his restraints and felt the one around his right wrist give. The pain of bone displacement in his hand was ignored as he yanked again. His hand was broken but free. There was a guard placed just above him on the bridge. Before she could react he swept his arm through the opening and brought her down and took her weapon. With the speed and strength of adrenaline he swung around, ready to fire, to kill the Master..._

_"No Jack! Don't!"_

_The Doctor's voice made him pause, to hesitate. His last vision was of the Master's triumphant expression as he raised his Laser Screwdriver and the painful light that filled his consciousness..._

_//Don't move.//_

Command. Deep in his mind. Jack struggled to understand... obey. Pain broadcasted from every cell that was in his body but at the same time he was numb. He had died but something was wrong, it was never this-

//Don't give yourself away, Jack.// The Doctor's mind voice, still that younger version of himself, was firm but soothing. Jack felt a feather touch in his hair. //Don't let him know you're back. Please.//

Desperation. Helplessness. Pleading. Jack struggled to remain still as his memories caught up. The Master had backhanded the Doctor and in a rare moment Jack's temper got the best of him. He broke free... he had a weapon... he had the opportunity...

'No, Jack! Don't!'

//I could have stopped this!// Jack fought to stay calm. The Doctor wanted him still... playing dead. The Time Lord was very serious. //Why did you stop me!//

//Because...// The Doctor's words choked off. //Because I can save him! I have to try to save him! He's... we were bound together...//

Bound. Jack took very shallow breaths, fighting the pain that radiated all over his body. He was healing but something was wrong. //You and he-//

//Yes. Centuries ago... when we were nearly grown. We loved each other... well I loved him... love him. He was always steady... I was always chaotic. But he changed, or maybe he was always this way and age brought it out. I don't know...//

Deep guilt... regret... failure. Jack let the information gather in his mind. His body... hurt. //What the hell did he do! It wasn't like this the last-//

The Doctor's frail fingers combed deeper into Jack's hair. //He was very angry. He's terrified of you... the impossible being that you are.// Affection. Concern. //He... let the Toclafane have at you a bit. They cut your spine in a few places. You'll heal but it'll take time.//

Jack felt a wave of panic spread through him. He wanted to raise his head, check himself out. He tried to open his eyes but eyelids would not move. But the pain was better managed. The Time Lord's mind was within his... as it used to be at times, when they made love especially. But it was different too, deeper... almost hidden... yet a permanent thread glowed gently between them. //So I'm not... wrong anymore?// he asked lightly but with some residual hurt. //Not a freak?//

He heard a tiny intake of breath from the Doctor, felt fingers tighten around his head. //You are who you are. Impossible but never wrong. I was and I deeply regret not coming back for you. I can't undo that. I can only hope you'll accept my apology and know that no matter what I would never leave you behind, except by your choice.//

Apology? Jack shivered with the effort not to react to the heart-felt words. Vaguely he could hear the Master above him, giving orders, speaking to the woman he had with him... Lucy... asking over and over again for her approval. //There's nothing to apologize for, Doctor. I love you. I told you... I would die for you...//

Deep emotions washed through Jack from the Doctor. Combined. Unidentifiable. Alien. Ancient. An odd energy wafted through Jack's nerves, a tidal wave of comfort... healing...

//What-//

//Hush.// The energy deepened. //Just accept. It's all I can do for you right now.//

Jack carefully let out a long breath as warmth returned to his limbs, to his extremities. He had felt the Doctor's healing touch before, lightly... for this and that. The Time Lord was always a little tired afterward but recovered quickly. But this was a pure surge, completely focused. Energy. The Doctor's life energy... //No!// Jack twitched as he began to struggle against his friend's efforts. //Don't do this! You'll have nothing for yourself!//

//I'll have you!//

Jack hissed aloud. //No! I'm nothing! Please don't...//

//Theta!//

There was a tearing. Harkness screamed as the Master's mind joined theirs and ripped the Doctor's presence from him. But still he felt the Doctor's own pain, the shock of separation.

//You filth!//

Jack grunted as he was kicked again and again, each blow further physically separating him from the Doctor. He opened his eyes, aware he could do so again. A quick glance told him he was whole but also gave hints of the damage that had been done... a lot of damage. He looked up to see the Doctor unconscious on the floor and the Master hovering over him, his fingers at the older man's temples. Jack tried to get up, to stop the other Time Lord from doing damage but his legs would not cooperate and something hard butted his shoulder.

"Don't let him come near us!" the Master sneered, his eyes still focused on the Doctor. "Disgusting filth!"

Jack swallowed, calculated what he could do then realized he could do nothing. He sensed the Master's mind within the Doctor's, a strange scary feeling that made his heart pound. There was a gentleness to the Master's touch, a fearful concern. Protective. Jack winced as the Master's presence seem to become aware of him but just as quickly he sensed his presence was dismissed as if not seen.

//I'm here, Jack. Don't provoke him.//

Casually said but Jack sensed the fear and fatigue. //I'm sor-//

//Stay hidden, Jack. I need you hidden! Let it play out. Martha is free. She will do what needs to be done but I need you whole... waiting...//

With that Jack's perception shifted. The Doctor was gone from his mind... but... Jack fought the temptation to reconnect. Hidden. His eyebrows went up as he watched the Doctor move slowly. The Master, for the moment, was careful with the older man as he helped him sit up.

"You let that freak touch you!"

The Doctor looked older, if possible, but his eyes sparked as he looked up at the other Time Lord. "Don't hurt him."

"He's not supposed to be here!" the Master nearly howled as if he could no longer take the tension. "He touched you!" His eyes narrowed on the Doctor. "You... TOUCHED... him! What is wrong with you!"

"He's my friend," the Doctor gritted out quietly, obviously in some discomfort though Jack could only feel it as a distant sensation. But he could feel it. "Don't hurt him."

"Hurt him!" The Master glanced at Jack then away as if even that much was too much. "I don't want to hurt him... I want him destroyed!" His hand gestured delicately and five Toclafane orbs appeared out of thin air. "Tear him apart!"

"No!" The Doctor's voice was barely above a whisper yet the orbs stopped immediately as if stunned. "Do this to him and there will be nothing between us... I swear it."

Jack felt pressure.... the Master's probe of the Doctor's mind... the Doctor holding himself open yet standing before an invisible door that held Jack's presence. Then the Master smiled as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Okay. Okay. You win!" The Master stood, still smiling. "The freak doesn't get to live as several pieces of immortal flesh. But he doesn't get to stay here! I won't have him touch you again... ever!" He bent low again to come face to face with the Doctor. "After a few years maybe you'll see it my way."

 

Jack opened his eyes slowly. He had been asleep. Unusual. He remembered walking in step with the Doctor, ignoring the stares from personnel, both those who had lived through "the year" and those who had not. They came to the TARDIS and the Doctor ushered him in for the first time since they had reunited, a week since he has forced himself into the TARDIS to destroy the Paradox Machine the Master had crafted. The Console room looked like a tornado had stayed a couple of days. Wires, both biological and plastic were hanging everywhere. But the walls were no longer blood red. The Console itself looked as if it were healing... regenerating.

But the Doctor didn't pause, didn't let Jack look more closely. Without warning his hand was taken in a strong hold and he was almost dragged down the hallway then down another one then through a door to... his own room.

 _"Sleep."_ was all the Doctor said as his fingertips grazed across Jack's forehead.

 _Bastard!_ Jack cursed silently as he got out of bed. He felt rested... somewhat. But that was the problem. He was supposed to be taking care of him, not the other way around. He grinned a bit as cool air alerted him. He was naked. The Doctor had stripped him. _Cheeky bastard._

He showered and changed then headed for the Console room. The change was amazing. The console looked almost like nothing had ever happened to it though Jack sensed the scars what would endure, could always sense the life that resided inside this machine.

"Have a good rest?"

Jack looked below. The Doctor was in the sub-deck under the grating, sonic screwdriver in one hand, some piece of alien technology in another. "You didn't have to do that," he responded lightly. "I don't need to sleep that much anymore."

"Yes you do," the Doctor countered as he knelt down to install whatever it was that had been in his hand. The hum of the sonic screwdriver filled the air. "You still need a bit more rest."

"Yeah?" Something caught his eye and he looked at the base of the console and saw a familiar sight. The Doctor's hand floated contentedly in the preservative fluids in the chamber Jack had made, barely degraded by time. It had been a treasure when he found it, when he sensed what it was. After more than a century it had given him new hope of finding the Doctor. But in the end, in the Master's hands, it had nearly destroyed the Earth... the Doctor...

_Damn, I'm a screw up. Almost did it again, eh Harkness?_

"You didn't do anything."

Too close... surprise. Jack turned without thinking, his hands raised in defense without warning. But before he could move the Doctor had taken his wrists in an iron hold, had drawn Jack close, his dark eyes intent. "Calm down, Captain."

Captain. The words were a trigger, set long ago... his first night aboard the TARDIS. Jack blinked. "How the hell do you do that!"

The Doctor's lips tilted upward. "Magic?"

Jack sighed. "Sounds right." He pulled his hands from the Doctor's grip but found them securely held. "You can let go."

"Never." The Doctor continued to study Jack. "Not unless you really want me to."

They were close. They were touching. Jack could feel his own heart beat fall into time with the Time Lord's. An ache appeared behind his eyes... long held tension trying to escape... long held pain and anger. There was a quiet pressure, scraping at the carefully erected walls...

"Don't!" Jack closed his eyes and struggled, mentally and physically. The Doctor was trying to... "I'm here for you! Don't!"

There was a pause. Gentle withdrawal. "I want to help you."

Guilt. Jack stared at the Doctor in disbelief. "You think this was your fault?" He grinned at him. "This wasn't your fault."

Tables turned. Jack could feel it as the Doctor tried to pull back but he wouldn't allow it. He grabbed the Doctor's arms and pushed him against the nearest wall. "It. Wasn't. Your. Fault!"

"I could have stopped him!" Suddenly rage assaulted Jack from within and without. The Oncoming Storm... Gold lit within the Doctor's pupils and he transformed before Jack's eyes. Powerful. But Jack held on. He had to hold on. 

"It happened, Doctor!" he yelled back. "It happened! You didn't make him what he was! You weren't responsible for his taking the TARDIS... assaulting her! You saved us! You tried to save him!" He closed his eyes against the pain radiating from the Time Lord. "But you know what? Sometimes... Doctor... the patient dies."

 

Silence. Pure silence. Even the TARDIS seem to hold her breath. Jack had his eyes screwed shut, afraid to open them. Just afraid...

_Jack._

Mind voice. The Doctor was within him again but not invasive as if respecting the barriers between them for the moment. Still Jack felt the need from his friend... that need held back by monumental effort. _Why?_

"Why what?" the Doctor asked gently, listening. 

Jack opened his eyes and took a long breath, his first in over a minute. At the same time he sensed the TARDIS resume her near-normal sounds, her own regeneration. "Why is she doing this?" he asked absently as he realized what had just happened. "Why is she letting me stay here?" He stared at the Doctor. "Didn't she try and get rid of me?"

"Not really no." The Doctor pulled himself from Jack grasp then took the younger man's hands. "Trust me?"

"Always." Jack managed a tired grin. "Even when you're being an ass."

The Doctor's eyebrows rose but he smiled. "Touch the console, Jack." He pulled and urged Harkness to turn. "Touch her."

Gentle encouragement flowed from the Time Lord's mind. Jack considered a moment then tentatively did as he asked. His hands slid over the edge of the living pedestal carefully. _Afraid._

"Don't be," the Doctor said softly as he forced Jack's hands flat onto the organic surface. "She never rejected you." The Doctor was behind him, his body pressed against his back, his breath in Harkness' ear. "What happened was because she was resisting me. If she wanted to get rid of you she would have thrown you into the Vortex the moment we dematerialized."

Warmth. Jack felt the sensation penetrate and fill him. TARDIS. From the moment he entered her all those years ago he had sensed the life within. She... he always knew she was a she, the Doctor never had to tell him.

"Always the flirt, my Jack." The Doctor's presence caressed Jack's mind. Jack felt a wave of deja vu, linking the present to some point in the past. Jack shook himself as the Doctor continued.

"I lied... a little... about leaving you. I didn't know. Not at first." Jack gasped as images flowed from the Doctor's mind. Rose stood in front of the TARDIS door, glowing golden bright... an impossible sight... powerful...

_I bring life..._

Jack lost his breath as pain radiated through him. The Doctor's body pressed more firmly against him. _Steady, Jack._ "I didn't know at the time... what she had done." Fingers brushed Jack's temple. "The bond between us broke."

Jack screwed his eyes shut as he felt it again, from the Time Lord's perspective... even more painful. The sudden loss, the pain. All that they had shared... gone. "I-" the Doctor's voice strained. "I had to save Rose. I had taken the Vortex into myself and was about to regenerate."

Jack felt it. Power tripled... tripled again. How had Rose survived? How had the Doctor?

 _You Humans are a mystery. Rose never should have survived... never. But me?_ Amusement filtered among the unending pain. _Time Lord trick... Regeneration._ Comfort filtered through the link between them. _I didn't feel your return... I was dying... Rose needed my help..._

_It's okay... It's okay..._

_No. Because later I knew you were alive. Our link... returned... minimally, barely noticeable._ Fingers caressed through Jack's hair, soothing. _I know you felt it too... I knew you knew. I even tried to track you. But Rose's actions caused a time shift. I couldn't go back to where you were and by the time I found you... you had already established your own timeline so I couldn't interfere until after the time we first... parted._ A sigh escaped the Doctor, his breath warm across the back of Jack's neck. "Then I was afraid to see you... alive. Ridiculous, I know."

"No, Doc." Jack could feel the TARDIS now, under his hands... around him. He had lost so much over the many decades... lives... loves... even enemies. "It's hard. Very hard."

The Doctor's arms went around Jack's waist in an embrace. "You've grown up since I last saw you." His hold tightened. "I'm sorry."

Jack shivered in spite of himself. Again he could feel the wending of the Doctor's life force attempting to touch deep. "Sometimes it's too much," he admitted without meaning to. "How do you stand it?"

"I tried not to get attached. Tried hard." A sigh escaped the Time Lord, a breath across the side of Jack's face. "But you and Rose... so many others... broke through." Lips pressed the back of Jack's neck. "You Humans are a catalyst race, you know... so little genes so much potential." Sigh. "I couldn't avoid the attachments so I avoided them... put them away... sometimes threw them away. I've hurt so many, Jack. Drew them in only to slap them down when they took the next natural step and came too close." Pause. "I don't think Martha will come back with me. I believe I've hurt her the most."

Short laughter escaped Jack. "But we always forgive you, Doctor. She's already forgiven you." He smiled as the image of her beautiful face flashed among his thoughts... so innocent a year ago... so hardened now. "Talented fighter. She'll make a great doctor... greater because of you."

"I don't know. She was pretty talented when I met her." The Doctor's hands moved over the borrowed t-shirt, over his chest. "I'd almost forgotten how you feel, Jack." The Doctor inhaled. "How you smell. I missed you."

Invitation... need... arousal... Jack bowed his head. So long since he had felt this... so long it felt as if they had never been... like this. Jack drew a deep breath, feeling unusually out of his element, even a little fearful. "I'm here for you, Doctor."

Cold air brushed across Jack's back as the Doctor quickly drew back then a moment later strong hands turned him, held his hands. "Look at me, Jack."

Command. The kind Jack couldn't resist. He brought his head up and met the dark gaze... so different from the mosaic of hazel he once knew. "I missed you too." Much to his dismay his voice was unsteady, emotional. He was losing control and he couldn't... this wasn't about him-

"But it is," the Doctor responded aloud. "Thank you."

Tears sprang into Jack's eyes. The Doctor's presence was deeper now, moving without pause... gently scraping. "I didn't do anything!" he yelled at the Time Lord. "I couldn't help you when you needed me!" Guilt he had long buried began to surface. He pushed at the Doctor but found he couldn't move away. "Don't!"

"I have to," the Doctor said gently as his fingertips rest on Jack's temples. "I need to, Jack. I can't... not..."

Jack gripped the Doctor's wrists and tried to pull the hands away. His vision blurred... all the years played out within his mind. The anquish of watching the TARDIS disappear the first time... all the other times... gone... No!

 _Share with me, Jack._ In the nearly two hundred years Jack's psychic and telepathic skills had grown stronger. But there was no contest here. The Time Lord was careful... gentle... but relentless. _I need to know, Jack. I need to know to help..._

Healing. Jack shook. The Doctor's arms now enfolded him, guided him down to the grating. Deep within Jack felt the building anger, frustration... simple grief well up. _I won't be able to stop!_

 _Yes, you will._ Scraping... Scraping... Jack knew it was too late. Too late...

The explosion was more an implosion. Jack heard an agonized scream then another... another. The pain... the endless pain... death... the hint of shadows beyond... strangely peaceful... beckoning long dead voices... then back to the harsh realities... no peace...

_Not all that way, Jack... not all that way..._

Time slowed... images of family... friends... casual lovers... then those he stopped to know better... the Doctor... Rose... Estelle... Thomas... Ianto... Jack felt the Doctor's soft kiss on his forehead. 

"Come with me."

Spoken aloud the words broke their deep sharing. Jack became aware of his surroundings. He sat on the grating, safely held in the Doctor's arms. His face felt raw, his soul restless. He twisted around and turned reddened eyes on his companion. "Damn you!"

The Doctor studied him, his expression soft and patient. "You needed perspective, something I'm still learning even all the years I've lived." His thumbs wiped at the moisture still running down Jack cheeks. "You needed to let go a few things." He pulled away from Jack and stood. "Come on." He held out a hand.

Numb. Jack knew what he felt. But it wasn't the same as the dark unfeeling wall he had erected around himself. It was... cleaner. The aftermath of a Storm... He sniffled, a little embarrassed by the sound. Sounds like I'm five years old. His eyes narrowed as bright amusement crossed the Doctor's face. "Guess I'd be a five year old in your eyes... even after all the years I've lived."

The amused expression became a seductive grin. "All the muscles in all the right places... not five... definitely not five." The Doctor wiggled his fingers. "Care for a dance, Captain Harkness?"

Dance. Strings of music... Glenn Miller... played in Jack's head. Memory shared. Jack managed a warm grin of his own as he took the Doctor's hand and pulled himself up. "Always the best pick up lines, Doc," he said with undisguised anticipation.

 

They walked side by side and wound up in Jack's room. In silence and with care they undressed themselves. Jack watched with curiosity and some lingering grief. His Doctor was gone, replaced by a leaner, paler but no less attractive body. Different but- He looked into the Doctor's dark eyes. No... the power was there... his Doctor's power... and compassion... and-

"Finished?" 

Startled Jack blinked. The Doctor stood nude before him, hands on hips, a bemused expression on his face. Jack licked his lips as his gaze drifted lower to take in the Doctor's arousal. "I see that one body part hasn't changed a bit," he assessed with a smirk.

The Doctor cocked his head and gave an answering grin. His own eyes studied Jack from head to toe. "Nothing's changed here." The Doctor stepped closer, his fingers drifted over Jack's chest. "Just the same... a fixed point."

There was a time... a year ago... when those words would have hurt. But the focused amusement coming from the Doctor changed that. Jack found himself relaxing, ready to enjoy. "So are we just going to stand here or-"

Breath left Jack's lungs as his back met the wall behind him. The Doctor's lips were on his, forcing deep contact. Passion. Need. Jack laughed a little as the Doctor allowed a brief pause for air. He returned the kiss and opened himself up to the Time Lord. _Yes! Oh god I missed this so much..._

 _Join with me, Jack Harkness._ Demand. Plea. Jack was vaguely aware they were moving, aware of the soft surface of a bed against his back. Join with me.

Jack didn't even think to hesitate or deny. His hands gripped the Doctor's shoulders. _Make love to me, Doctor. Let me help you too._

Jack moaned then cried out as the Time Lord's mind fully invaded, much as he had that first time years ago... centuries ago. Power. Want. The physical act was almost forgotten as the Doctor's mind sought... explored... touched. For a moment he relived his years at Torchwood, the triumphs and failures... 

_My brave Jack... no wonder I love you so..._

Vaguely he felt the Doctor's hardened cock enter him as his own body moved to meet him. Love. They had said it before... to each other... to Rose. But there was a change, much as they had changed. Deeper. Stronger. In a single moment Jack felt the sharing change, no longer guided by the Time Lord. He was within the Doctor's mind, his memories... seeing glimpses of the Doctor's life... the vision of a young Master... Gallefrey... then the traveling... making right what should not have gone wrong... then-

Jack stiffened as he felt the fire, relived the horror of the moment when the Doctor knew what had been set into motion, what could not be take back. The energies faltered as pain countered their love making. The Doctor began to loose himself to the terrifying moment when everything burned... when the Time Lord began to let himself fall into the Void to stop the unending soul-deep fires...

 _Don't do it, Doctor!_ Jack physically grabbed the Doctor and changed their positions until he was on top. He leaned back, feeling the Doctor's cock fill him again. The connection... he needed to make the connection or his friend... his lover... would never stop the cycle of pain within himself. _You did what needed to be done! You're here... now... you have done far more than you have taken away._

 _No one should have so much power!_ came the Doctor's grief-stricken response. Fire. Darkness. Silence. Playing again and again... _I had no right... I have no right to do what I've done... even since the Wars..._

• Jack pushed back, forced his muscles to stimulate the arousal within him. His hands enveloped the Doctor's head and he forced his own presence into the Time Lord's mind. _Past or future! You are the thread that holds the universe together! Without you there would only be the devastation and chaos the Time Wars were promising to us all. We would all have been trapped in endless cycles of time loops until we ceased to exist! Would that have been better?_

There was resistance then grave acknowledgement, a faint validation. But still the grief existed... the eternal emptiness within the hearts that beat in time to Jack's own... more empty now that the Master was truly gone.

Jack paused in his movements above the Doctor and gazed into the dark eyes that watched him with a mixture of some awe and great passion. Empty. Jack knew then what he could do, what gift he could give to his lover that might bring some permanent balance to the ancient man's soul. With renewed energy Jack moved his body up and down, his fingers glided of the Doctor's smooth skin, his mind encouraged the Time Lord to wild abandoned. Together they moved, body to body, mind to mind, leaving thoughts in favor of sensation. Together they came, releasing themselves to each other in cries and shouts. As the Doctor's arms wrapped around his body to pull him down, hold him close, Jack's lips pressed to the Time Lord's ear and he whispered four words he hoped would bind them for as close to forever as the Fates would allow.

"You. Are. Not. Alone."


End file.
